That was the week that was, in no small part

Let’s consider some hidden gems last week in baseball annals:

Michael Buffer voice: “Let’s get ready to ruminate…”

“I alone have escaped to tell thee”…(Coleridge-to-Tinker-to-No Chance, Wrigley Field 8/14/85).

Pity the poor Pirates —  The defense rests. And rests and rests. It’s bad. They just finished a stretch of at least one error in 16 of the last 17 games through April 20. Defense wins ball games. The Pirates lose ball games. Get it? And what ya gonna do next? Punt.

Addendum: The Bucs were one of Branch Rickey’s stops. Luck is the residue of design, he said. So, this is the residue of what?

Hidden Ball Trick Pony — Ronny Paulino discovered an interesting twist to catching the damn baseball already. The old rawhide ripped into ye olde throat guard and Houdini-like disappeared within the chest protector trick. Yeah, it happens every spring. Err, Paulino was no worse for wear although he took a while to produce the ball.

Hidden Ball Trick Pony Part Two — Maybe that’s how they do things in Havana, but Yunei Escobar seemed almost shocked his hidden ball trick didn’t fool anybody at Atlanta. That’s not how we do it this side of the Sugar Curtain, Charlie.

Final fallout from Padres-Rockies 22 inning affair — It only took 659 pitches for the Rockies to score that exciting — if you like to watch cricket, shuffleboard, or bass fishing, paint dry — 2-1 victory for the ages and it took the ages to do so, longest game in innings played since 1993 and eighth longest game in time played since 1920.  But that’s not even the good part. They don’t have no stinking curfew in the National League — The AL won’t even think about starting an inning after 1 a.m. — but they sure as shooting do at Lindbergh Field San Diego. Flights are not supposed to leave after 3 a.m. However, regional airport authorities special sauced the baseball charters. Home team first, the Padres left around 3:15 a.m. for Phoenix, followed by the Rockies to Houston. Unfortunately, with the time change and all, The Rockaroos got to Oil Town at 7 a.m., just in time for morning glory commute. Funskis! Of course, air rage. Rockies scored six runs in the top of the 1st Inning and cruised to victory. Padres, not so much. Another day, another loss to the high flying D-Backs.

Torii Hunter Bentley IV Jr. , Sir —  The new Bentley was a real trip for the guy who came from the ghetto to make it big. But it didn’t get very far. Rear-ended just a few blocks from the ballpark. A bit bruised and battered, nevertheless Hunter took the field and took it out on the Mariners (not so ancient, see Coleridge citation above) crashing into the fence as he robbed Richie Sexson of what would have been a game winning  home run in the 9th Inning.

Khalil Greene — Something is rotten in the state of the normally sure-handed and steady shortstop. Two errors in barely a week. Strikeouts and not much else at the plate. He just plain looks distracted.   Time for some consummate zen, Mojombo.

And so it goes…

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